I was almost dozing off to sleep out of boredom yesterday afternoon at the ward, when I was snapped out of it by the sheer mention of the name "Dr Haliza Shafie" over TV3 6-something news.
My heart sank. I managed to mumble, " Innalillah hi wa inna ilayhi rojiun ..."
It was only last Monday when Ayah & I passed by her clinic en route to the surau at APSH that I told Ayah we'd better call her nurse to check on Ameer's vaccination schedule. I was quite sure there must be one due for 6 year old. I felt like dropping by her clinic there & then but it was quite late and I didn't want to bother the nurse whom I supposed would already be tired by that hour of the day and would probably be ready to call it a day anytime.
Little that I knew that THAT was my own version of a hazy premonition of some sort. Of course, it might just be a coincidence. But I do get a lot of this kind of coincidences, and I sometimes wonder if I should work harder to sharpen my 6th sense.
The news left my jaw dropped for a long while - shocked, denial, sad - all emotions jumbled up at the same time. I called Ayah but no answer. I had no clue who else to call to share the gruesome news I just overheard from the tube.
When Ayah arrived with the two musketeers later that night, I shared with him the news. He was speechless. We accessed Star online and the news on the "Missing Doctors" was already uploaded.
This morning, when Dr Ashar came for his morning rounds, he asked if I've heard the news. I told him that she was our 3 children's Paed and he nodded in silence. As he removed the IV needle from my hand, he calmly confirmed the news about the discovery of the body and shared some insights into the initial search that had started a few days back in which he was also involved. I had to bite my lips to control my tears.
At this juncture, images of Dr Haliza - in her oh-so-familiar professional yet very calm, caring, feminine, motherly gentle voice & gesture, giving both Ayah & I the much needed advise and assurance that it's okay to learn about caring for babies & toddlers as we go along and not to be too scared about learning it from real life experience - kept flashing in and out of my mind uncontrollably.
Allahyarhammah Dr Haliza was first recommended to me by Dr Jem (my gynae, who's also Dr Ashar's wife) to be my first born Paediatrician way back in 1996 . I've not heard of Dr Haliza before, but how could I refuse a sound recommendation from Dr Jem? Since then, Dr Haliza has been all of our 3 boys' Paed, right from Abang Idin, then to Hafiz, then to Ameer.
She was the one who gave all our 3 boys their vaccinations & inoculation, the jabs, the tickles and also the stern warnings not to consume too much ice cream & lollies. She was the one who attended to Abang Idin when he had pneumonia when he was barely 4 months old. She was the one who attended to Hafiz with all the common baby illnesses as listed in Johnson & Johnson's baby book (from jaundice to cradle cap to pink eye to colic to diarrhea, you name it, Hafiz got it). She also talent spotted Ameer as 'one tough cookie' as he hardly ever cried each time she injected those needles into his cute little butt or arm - so unlike his two elder brothers who cried the whole Ulu Klang river.
I had no doubt before this that if I were fated to have another one, insyaAllah, it would surely still be her to summarise the Apgar scores, to hold and cuddle the little fingers, hands & butt of my newborn in the same loving and caring way that she had done for all my 3 boys.
But of course, we could only plan. We are all still subject to the Master Plan.
To the family of the late Dr Haliza Shafie, our sincere takziah and condolence. May Allah bless her soul. Semuga Allahyarhammah ditempatkan bersama orang-orang yang beriman dan beramal soleh, insyaAllah....
AL-FATIHAH .....
:(
Ibu
p/s To Dr Jem, if by a miracle of chance you do drop by this humble blog entry, I must thank you from the bottom of my heart (long overdue) for introducing Allahyarhammah Dr Haliza to our family. We shall miss her dearly....
